during the holiday, i asked the other if they would't mind writing up a report on their experience and impression of austria. here is the first of these, by neil.
synopsis of my time in the land of austria – part one: introduction
well then, well then, well then, good game, good game.
and so the flying sweats begin, two days before we’re* due to jet off to
australia austria. i really don’t enjoy the experience of being packed into a tin can and being catapulted off at mach 10, or whatever, and cruising at an altitude of 35+ thousand feet! it’s just ‘plane’ wrong. so, we all arrive at manchester airport by train, three hours before check-in, thanks to the cunning, planning doctor who is gemma. thank you gemma. we check-in and edge forward to the departure lounge, where i, unwittingly, draw out a homemade bacon barm to eat. apparently such items should have been declared and disposed of before entering the departure lounge. how very rude of me. forgive?
two pints of lager later and we’re good to go, to the departure gate that is. our flight is announced and i go grey inside. lee returns from the toilet just before boarding. by this time my palms are leaking like a sewerage outlet. please god let us land safely. pleeeeeease. i’m braced for takeoff and sink back into my seat. clasping onto deb’s hand we’re 100ft in the air before i know it. no turbulence please i’m english! ummmmm, what to choose, what to choose; the flight catalogue is plucked from its resting nest and i’m browsing the booze menu before you can say ‘i’m not a celebrity…get me out of here!’. should i have a jd or cider…cider it is. prost! i’m on us holidays. i’m tentatively beginning to enjoy the sense of flying. i hope there aren’t any nutters on board who try to open the emergency exits. are the cabin crew trained in hand to hand combat?we land safely and i thank the cabin crew for a pleasant journey. alighting the plane the austrian heat hits us. we’ve arrived! 'wie alt bist du!’.
having arrived at the playmobil size airport of salzburg we find ourselves in a bit of predicament; tom’s bag has gone missing! to be honest though, as much as this was a great inconvenience to tom, and i think i say this on behalf of all the males present, thank the dear gods it wasn’t one of the girls’ bags that didn’t turn up! tom handled this difficult time like a real trouper. a+. i did offer him a turn of my underpants but he gracefully declined. to conclude this matter, tom’s bag was delivered by the airport a few days later. that night tom threw an exceptional clothes, shoes and suntan cream party.
* neil, deb, tom, gemma, john, christina, lee.